Better Sleep, Brighter Days: A Journey to Restful Nights.

Perfectionist, when you hear it like that, it sounds like a compliment, right? You’re praised for your perfectionism. Most people beam when they hear it, but is it always a compliment? There’s nothing wrong with being a perfectionist, but it becomes a problem when it comes at the expense of your own well-being. Have you ever wondered why we become perfectionists? Often, it's not something we’re born with, but rather a skill we pick up along the way. But what triggers us to develop this drive for perfection? What experiences cause us to keep raising the bar for ourselves and for others? It took me a while to realize that I had gone too far with my perfectionism and that it wasn’t really a compliment for me anymore. I used to see it as a badge of honor. Until I started digging deeper into what I was trying to hide with my perfectionism. During my burnout, I discovered that deep down, I believed I wasn’t good enough and that failure simply wasn’t an option. The conditioning I imposed on myself was so strong that I gave it everything I had to avoid failure, because I wanted to avoid that feeling, of not being good enough, at all costs. As an extra challenge, I kept raising the bar to prove that I was truly good at everything I did. But even when I succeeded, it didn’t fill the gap in my self-esteem; the emptiness inside remained. And when things went wrong? I became my own worst and harshest critic, showing not a shred of compassion for myself or my situation. This only made me tougher on myself, convinced that one day I’d reach my goal and fill that emptiness. Every time, I thought, "If I reach this goal, I’ll feel better." But of course, that wasn’t the case. Material things and promotions didn’t fill the gap or make me feel happier. The higher I set the bar, the harder I had to work and the more difficult it became not to fail. The pressure on myself kept growing and eventually, I unknowingly gave myself that final push towards my burnout, fueled by my need for validation and fear of failure. Looking back, it was a vicious cycle that I had trapped myself in, keeping the behavior alive. It was all about avoiding failure, about feeling good enough, by not making mistakes and doing everything as perfectly as possible. Because it never really brought me satisfaction, I kept raising the bar, hoping that one day it would. Of course, there are many reasons why people become perfectionists, it varies from person to person. Everyone is unique, but no one is perfect and that’s completely fine. For me, it was essential to understand why I was trapped in my perfectionism, why I felt I wasn’t good enough, where the fear of failure came from, and why the need to prove myself was so strong. I knew I had to do something about it, even though it wasn’t an easy task. It was time to feel better without constantly worrying about what could go wrong. What I learned from my coach is that making mistakes is inevitable, you simply can’t learn without falling and getting back up. And yes, that may sound a bit harsh, but it gets to the heart of it. Besides that, I really had to work on my self-confidence to overcome that feeling of not being good enough. The conversations and support from my coach helped me tremendously to understand where that feeling of inadequacy and fear of failure came from, allowing me to work on my self-esteem. My meditation teacher played a crucial role in this; she helped me to reconnect with myself and see myself again, which gave my self-confidence a significant boost. Together, they helped me break the vicious cycle and let go of those strong conditionings. Through this, I learned that it’s okay if things don’t go perfectly. It’s not the action that defines the person, but the lesson you take from it. Perfectionism is often a trigger that runs deeper than you think and it ultimately leads to certain behaviors. If you want to do something about it, you’ll have to dig deeper to find the cause. We’re here to help you with that journey. Feel free to reach out through the website if you need assistance. “I never lose, I either win or learn,” – Nelson Mandela – Perfectionism is an illusion, placing us in an endless cycle of self-criticism and failure. It’s time to let go of that false image of perfection and embrace the fact that real growth and fulfillment come from accepting our imperfections and learning from our mistakes. Let’s celebrate our failures, effortlessly.

What comes to mind when you hear the word "acceptance"? For me, it always felt like something I had to do, like it required action on my part. But why do we think that? Have you ever considered that acceptance might also mean doing nothing? What does it mean to accept things from that perspective? In my view, "accepting" isn't about giving approval or making promises. It's about acknowledging a situation as it is, without fighting it or trying to change it. It means embracing reality, with the trust that everything unfolds as it should. By accepting, you recognize that things might not always go as hoped or expected. It’s a way to find inner peace by realizing that everything happens in its own way and time; because really, "everything is okay." During my journey toward the idea of "everything is okay," I realized that both unpleasant and joyful experiences are part of life, part of our own journey. I used to think everything started with "acceptance," because I often didn't go with the flow of life. I didn’t want to believe that things just are the way they are and unfold as they do. Just like now, I can be grateful for my burnout, but when I was in the middle of it, I couldn’t imagine ever being thankful for it. Accepting something that once caused me so much pain has ultimately given me so much, especially a new perspective on life. I used to find myself in situations where acceptance played a key role, but fortunately, I've been able to shift to the mindset that "everything is okay." However, this was not without its struggles. When I burned out, I didn’t immediately realize how serious it was. I thought I was just a little off and could keep working. I didn’t see that I needed to slow down or even stop working for a while. My coach had to step in and hit the brakes for me, and I’m incredibly grateful to her because I couldn’t have done it myself. I didn’t realize how bad things had gotten and refused to accept the situation. I thought I just needed a little rest and would be back at it after a few weeks. It felt like a huge setback when I was told after a few weeks that I had to stop working for the time being and take a break. With a lot of pain and struggle, I realized I was completely burned out and surrendered to the exhaustion, sadness, and all the emotions. As difficult as it was, deep down I knew it was time. Yet, I couldn’t fully allow myself to accept it, as the situation stirred up feelings of failure and inadequacy. To avoid these feelings, I resisted and couldn’t fully go with the flow of life. I was advised to "accept" the situation. I didn't understand how this would help me, which made it even more difficult. But I had no choice, so I had to learn to accept my situation and trust that everything would be okay. Since I couldn't immediately see and apply this, I needed many conversations to understand what was happening to me. It was deeply rooted, but I couldn’t ignore it anymore. Several times, I hit rock bottom and realized that the only way out was to change and go with the flow of life. To gain control over this situation, I started working on my feelings of failure and inadequacy. I received a lot of support and help from both my coach and my meditation teacher. By trusting and going with the flow, I was able to confront the pain and fully feel the sadness. Meditation brought me peace and calmness, helping me let go of my thoughts and get closer to my inner self. From the moment I started meditating, I gradually felt better and became more aware and in tune with my feelings. I discussed my daily experiences with my coach and learned to handle challenges more effectively. These conversations were valuable for my reflection and helped me put things in perspective. The combination of meditation and coaching was essential in reshaping my life and experiencing it in a new way. "We cannot change anything unless we accept it." - Carl Jung - I realized that acceptance is synonymous with going with the flow of life. When you're in this flow, "acceptance" becomes unnecessary for continuing your journey effortlessly: The Effortless Movement.

"You are exhausted, you need some time to recover" , she said. "No, I can keep going. I'll be back at work tomorrow" , I stubbornly replied. "Why is it so hard to admit that your body needs rest?" she asked. "Standing still and making mistakes feel like failure to me, and that doesn't feel good" , I admitted. "Aren't you allowed to make mistakes?" she asked, surprised. Why be so hard on yourself? Where do you begin with showing compassion? When I was burned out, I struggled with this immensely. I didn't know where to start. Gradually, I realized that everything begins with love: first love for yourself and then love for others. Before I burned out, I quickly moved past my sadness and emotions. I couldn't handle them; feeling them was too heavy and I felt like I lingered in that pain and situation for too long. So, I decided to push my sorrow away faster and made it easier for myself by saying: "Others have it much worse, this isn't so bad." Then I could easily move on without dwelling on my feelings, because for me, "standing still was moving backward." And I did this year after year, until I couldn't anymore and was forced to stop. Apparently, I had developed this mechanism to avoid feeling and confronting emotion and pain. This led me to focus on doing everything as perfectly as possible so that such moments would occur less often. Making mistakes was not an option for me, and I did everything to prevent them. These kinds of patterns often arise from events and experiences in your life. They cause you to be strict and hard on yourself without even realizing it. Why can compassion be healing? During my coaching journey, we talked extensively about "compassion." This was a challenge I struggled with because I wasn't allowed to make mistakes. In the past, this resulted in perfectionist behavior. Under pressure and stress, this behavior became controlling and demanding. Making mistakes felt like failure, like not being good enough, and gave me a sense of exclusion. Although I knew I was a perfectionist, I had never realized how far it could go. When I burned out, I felt terribly lonely because I felt I had failed. I didn't want to be alone because that loneliness was overwhelming, more intense than I had ever experienced. My breakdown felt like failure, a mistake I supposedly had to learn to live with. At that moment, my coach advised me to show more compassion for myself. It was incredibly difficult to apply this. The only question I had was: How? During this period of reflection, I was prompted to think about my view of myself compared to others. How can you love others if you don't love yourself? How can you show compassion for others if you can't muster it for yourself? And why do you allow others to make mistakes but not yourself? Then it suddenly hit me that I had been very strict and hard on myself all this time, while I could be gentle with others. Alongside my coaching journey, I also started meditating. Both have helped me enormously in my journey toward inner growth and self-love. My awareness grew, and I learned to be kinder to myself. The key was to ask myself in those situations: how would I react if it were my child, partner, friend, or mother? Over time, I noticed my self-image changing, and I could look at myself with more compassion. This gave me more confidence and filled me with love, both for myself and for others. I could now experience empathy and compassion on a deeper level simply because I allowed myself to make mistakes and learn from them. I realized that life is not about how others judge your achievements or appreciate your efforts, but about how lovingly you can look at yourself; everything else follows naturally. "There are no failures, only outcomes. As long as I learn something, I am succeeding." - Tony Robbins - The journey to self-compassion, a path leading to inner growth and love, is essential for healing and self-love. By focusing on love for yourself, other aspects of life effortlessly fall into balance: The Effortless Movement.

Letting go is something we hear a lot but sometimes find hard to understand completely. I remember being confused when people told me, "You just need to let go." I'd ask myself, "How?" And most importantly, what does it really mean? Sometimes, we get stuck and don't know what to do next. In those times, we wish we had a magic crystal ball to show us the way. So, when is it best to let go? I often thought about this, especially when others suggested it. But how do you actually do it? And what are you supposed to let go of? Is it a person, your fears, your anger, your sadness? These thoughts were confusing, and I didn't know how to handle them. Instead of letting go, it felt like I was holding on tighter, desperately trying to control what was important to me. But eventually, I realized there was some truth to the idea of letting go, as holding on only made things worse. Ultimately, letting go is an act of love, for oneself and for others. I had to learn to let go, or I would just keep exhausting myself. But that was easier said than done. I realized how important it is to let go when I pushed myself too hard, got completely burnt out, and my body couldn't keep going. I didn't know what to do next. People told me I needed to let go of my old self. I was confused; did I really have to give up who I used to be? After all, that version of myself had brought me to where I am today. I continued to struggle with letting go of situations and emotions. My thoughts consumed me, and I found myself trapped in a cycle of worry and speculation. Did I need to become someone else entirely? Was I not good enough? But as challenging as it was, I realized I needed to learn to let go to free myself from the burdens I carried. Although I didn't know exactly how to do it, I was determined to move forward step by step. "In the process of letting go you will lose many things from the past, but you will find yourself." - Deepak Chopra - How can you let go? It was a challenge because I didn't fully understand what it meant. I struggled with the concept because I saw it as stopping, breaking, or letting go forever. The idea that I had to let go of my old self seemed to imply it would disappear completely, which frustrated me. Through deep conversations with my coach, I began to understand that letting go doesn't mean something disappears from your life. These thoughts were driven by fear, especially the fear of losing control. The beauty of letting go is that you release the need to control the outcome and embrace the idea that every outcome is good. For me, letting go didn't mean my old self disappeared. I learned to approach situations differently, knowing my old self would always be a part of me. The most important thing I learned was to let go of control. I no longer needed to be in control, trusting that whatever came my way was for the best. Letting go didn't mean I was weak; it meant I was powerful enough to release what no longer served me. Why is letting go important? If you don't learn to let go, you often keep worrying and feeling anxious. This can lead to stress and anxieties, causing you to withdraw further into yourself. It can even result in feelings of loneliness and exclusion, as you shut yourself off from others in an attempt to gain control over the situation. During this time, I started meditating, also at my coach's suggestion. Meditating every day brought more focus and made it much easier to let go effortlessly. I felt the calmness and peace increasing by both meditating and letting go. When you acknowledge that you've done your best and everything you could, you can find peace with the outcome and accept it with open arms. In this way, you can ride the waves of life instead of swimming against them, allowing yourself to be carried along with the current. It opens the door to more inner peace, resilience, and freedom. Despite the challenges it brings, learning to let go can be a valuable skill that helps you lead a more fulfilled and balanced life. In our journey of letting go, we find strength and embrace the truth that all outcomes are good, leading to inner peace and freedom: The Effortless Movement.

What is friendship? Oke, what does friendship actually mean? That was a question that frequently crossed my mind. With whom can I be friends? Nowadays, I look at the subject of "friendship" differently. For me, friendship is a loving bond. It's a relationship you can form with anyone. A relationship without expectations, social pressure, or complicated rules. A bond where boundaries are natural, without judgment. Where you can be fully yourself, your true self. I only wish to engage in friendships that are equal and healthy. Friendships in which I don't have to struggle alone and where I don't have to force myself to maintain the friendship by myself. Especially the feeling that a friendship effortlessly endures, where mutual respect and setting boundaries are fully natural. I now feel suffocated if a friendship is not mutual. Because then I'm not honest with myself, as I try to maintain such a friendship. It now drains me of energy, whereas I wasn't aware of it before. I was constantly trying to bridge the gaps in a friendship, just to give myself a good feeling, which was unfair to myself. If a friendship doesn't feel right, it's better to let it go. Why do we label a friendship as "best" friend? In my youth, I was bullied a lot, both at school and in the neighborhood. This made it almost impossible for me to make friends, especially a "best" friend. While most around me had a "best" friend, that wasn't the case for me. Friendships changed regularly due to disagreements and jealousy. Yet as a child, I also longed for such a close bond, someone to play with, to have adventures with, just to have fun. Having almost no friends made me feel like I didn't belong anywhere. This made me feel lonely and excluded because it was difficult to form a close friendship. Not receiving invitations to birthday parties or simply not being asked to play and eat lunch with someone only reinforced this feeling. I felt invisible, as if I wasn't good enough to be friends with. Often, we have an idea of what a close friendship should look like, but sometimes we don't want to admit when it's not healthy. This is also how it's perceived in society, where there's a certain unwritten social pressure. From a young age, we're shaped by this system; at home, on the street, at school, during sports, basically everywhere. We grow up with certain expectations, judgments, and conditionings that influence our view on friendships. For me, this way of thinking lies in the past. What I nowadays wonder is: what does the label "best" for a friend actually mean? Sometimes it seems more like a label than a real meaning. As if there's an unwritten rule that you're only truly connected and "must" do things together if you're "besties". But does a close friendship always mean that you have to label each other as "best friends"? I don't believe that striving to be "best friends" should be a goal in itself; the close bond arises naturally when there's space for it. Yet it's ingrained in us from a very young age. If you don't have a best friend, it seems like something is wrong with you, and you might even be told that you need to work on it. As if the absence of a best friend will affect the rest of your life. Why do we experience social pressure? Very simple, you long for inclusion. You also want to be part of society because otherwise, you feel different from others, in other words, excluded and alone, which is not fun at all! That's the motivation to comply with the unwritten rules of society. As long as we collectively don't bring about change in this, it will continue to affect the next generations. With the rise of social media, it's only getting more complicated. This makes the need to break free from it even more crucial. With this way of thinking, I conclude that having a "best" friend is unimportant. Over the past year, I've had to work hard on this, accepting and letting go. Feeling alone wasn't pleasant, but unfortunately, I had to go through it. Especially at that moment, I actually longed for best friendships, if only I could avoid the feeling of being alone. With help, conversations, and sometimes frustrations, I've had to work hard to let go of this mindset. I'm very glad that my perspective on this topic is now different. What I've learned from this is that self-love and being friends with yourself are actually much more important than anything else. Only in this way can you build healthy and meaningful relationships with others, where you accept each other and can be fully yourself. "If you make friends with yourself, you will never be alone." - Maxwell Maltz – Realizing this could help in dealing with the social pressure from society. It can lead to making well-considered choices that feel right for you. Moreover, it can provide more space and freedom to not do everything out of obligation, but rather out of love, love for yourself and for others. Amidst the social pressure in the quest for true friendship, you learn the true meaning of friendship: loving, without expectations, without judgment, and above all, with yourself as your most important companion: The Effortless Movement.

"It's very busy in my head!" I said. "Do you worry a lot?" she asked. "I just have a lot of thoughts, which prevents me from finding peace in my head, that's not really worrying, right?" I asked. Where can the fullness of thoughts in your head come from? Often, people wonder where that fullness of thoughts in their head comes from. Well, everyone has thoughts, and sometimes quite a few in a day. Some thoughts remain, while others are quickly forgotten. It's completely normal to have thoughts; with everything happening around us, they come in effortlessly. In that, we are all the same. Have you ever wondered if all those thoughts you have, will ever become reality? Most of the time, thoughts are illusions, distractions from what is actually happening. And yet, we continue to see our thoughts as truth. Why do thoughts have such a strong influence on our actions, behaviors, and thinking? This sometimes makes it difficult to see situations clearly. Everyone views life through their own lens, influenced by their own experiences, which ultimately determines the thoughts that come to you. In the past, I could write thick books in my mind. As soon as a situation arose that gave me an unpleasant feeling, thoughts flowed in effortlessly, one after the other. It's very difficult not to think about it; you get stuck in the thought, which manifests as worrying. Because you can't get out of it, your head gets more crowded. I could get so lost in my thoughts that I became grumpy, irritated, and even stressed. It can have such a big impact on you. Actually, I didn't want to get caught up in it, but the thoughts kept feeding themselves almost automatically or if I paid attention to them. I've often asked myself afterwards, if it was worth it? The answer was a resounding NO! Because in the end, my thoughts were so harsh and cold, especially towards myself. This led me to constantly judge myself, even though the situation turned out to be not that bad afterwards. What can help calm your thoughts? Thoughts can often be very confronting as well. They can mirror your worst nightmare, where you often don't even want it to become reality. I thought I could keep going endlessly, that I had infinite energy and that nothing or no one could stop me. Until my body literally said, "Now I stop, I'm done, completely done!" The thoughts I had about myself at that time were frustrating, exhausting, and unkind. I felt like a failure and not good enough, because my thoughts told me that was the reality. I wasn't aware that it wasn't true at all; I just couldn't see it. Sometimes, however, you have to stand still, otherwise you can't heal and let go of the pain. But in the past, I always thought the faster I could get over it, the better. This was so ingrained in my mind that my body couldn't give any other signal than to stand still. It took some time, but eventually, I could finally let go of the thoughts of failure and accept that it was okay that this happened to me. Gradually, I noticed that my thoughts also changed, which allowed me to have more compassion for myself. With coaching and meditation, I began to believe in myself more and more, becoming kinder to myself and not constantly feeling like I "had" to do everything. But the stream of thoughts didn't stop on its own. Through help, I learned to observe my thoughts. This was very important to understand that I wasn't my thoughts and that they could sit beside me. Instead of getting completely absorbed in my thoughts, where I judged both my thoughts and myself. This allowed me to stop the stream of thoughts in time, and with a lot of practice, it became more and more natural. "You are not your thoughts. You are the conscious presence behind your thoughts." - Eckhart Tolle – One person might have more thoughts than another. Another person might be better at dealing with thoughts, which also depends on the experiences we carry with us. So, don't be too hard on yourself. If you can't solve it alone, ask for help. What helped me a lot was life coaching and meditation. This way, I could share my thoughts uncensored, observe them in between, and eventually discuss them with someone who did not judge me. It was so nice that someone took the time to listen to me. Additionally, meditating brought more calm and peace within me, allowing me to let go of stress and fears. I had the confidence that it would get better one day. And I can tell you today, gradually it did. I can now deal with it better and distance myself from my thoughts without passing judgment and showing compassion for myself. I no longer see my thoughts as the truth, but can now look at them filtered, without emotion. Let's strive together for balance in our thoughts, where we find inner peace and clarity, away from the fullness of thoughts in our heads: The Effortless Movement

What does gratitude really mean? What do you think of when asked, "What are you grateful for?" Gratitude, as the name suggests, is about being thankful, having appreciation. Although it's not that you don't know what it means, it's often more that you don't know how to answer the question. Perhaps you're afraid of giving the wrong answer, or that someone will judge you based on your response. It may also be the case that when the question is asked, you even wonder: "Yes, what am I actually grateful for?" It can sometimes be quite difficult to describe what you're grateful for, especially if you don't regularly reflect on it. In the past, when I was asked the question, I didn't know what to answer. I had no clue. I was one of those people who preferred to keep quiet, and if I did say something, it was usually something like: my children, my house, my car, my job, and so on. I couldn't describe well what I was grateful for. I never found it necessary because I had to keep going on and therefore stopping and thinking felt like a waste of time. But when asked if I was grateful, my answer was always, "Of course!" Gratitude truly comes to life when you feel it, deep within. When you talk about it, it gives a certain tingling sensation, an indescribable urge to express it. Everyone experiences the feeling in their own way, which is why gratitude can be different for everyone. Although the way of feeling may vary, everyone feels something of gratitude, one perhaps more than the other. This is also influenced by whether the subject occupies your mind regularly or sporadically. When I started writing, I knew it would be a difficult topic. However, it's even more challenging than I thought. Gratitude is difficult to put into words; it's indescribable. Nevertheless, I'm going to give it a try and share my experience. Last year, I received a beautiful wake-up call that changed my life and mindset forever. It began with the question: "What are you grateful for?" At that time, I had no answer. I was in a situation where, at that moment, I felt grateful for nothing. I was burnt out and didn't know what was happening to me. When I was asked the question, "Do you think you could ever be grateful for this experience in your life?" I literally said, "Why, I can't come out of this as I was before?" And what I didn't know then, but I know now, of course I wouldn't become like I was; that ship has sailed. I didn't understand how they could ask me that question; it hit me hard. Can't you see how I am feeling, I thought. How could I be grateful for something that had turned my life upside down and literally left me standing still? By practicing gratitude daily in the beginning, I noticed that my perspective on situations began to change. It started with being grateful for the very small things, like: getting up, making my breakfast, watching TV, getting dressed, etc. Because the big things were still a step too far. Gradually, I gained more energy and could do more and more. This was the first step in seeing what effect gratitude already had on me. The assistance I received from my coach provided me with even more insights into what gratitude brought about. At the same time, through meditation, I went with the flow of life. I learned to accept, and ultimately be grateful for, that too. At some point, I also saw bigger things that I could be grateful for. After a few months, I returned to the question: "Can you be grateful for this period of reflection?" The answer was: "Yes, very grateful. I'm grateful that it happened to me." My view on life had changed; I looked at life with a different perspective. I realized that I could look at situations differently, where I could see what was important to me. I could enjoy moments with myself, not feeling alone anymore; now I look forward to being alone again from time to time. How beautiful is it when you can see what makes your life beautiful? "If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you always got." - Albert Einstein - Gratitude for me now no longer lies in objects but in the subtle things. What I mean by that, it often sounds cliché when someone says: I'm grateful for the air, oxygen, sun, moon, nature, waking up in the morning. But that's where it starts. The realization that you are alive and not just existing, that was so important to me. This triggered me to think deeper about it. It's important to know that there's no right or wrong, and that you're free to say or think what you want, without judgment from yourself or others. In my opinion, gratitude comes from within, it actually comes from deep very deep within your bones. That's the feeling I get when I feel grateful: the joy, the love, my heart warming up, and so on. How can you practice gratitude? In the beginning, it's useful to take a moment for yourself, so you can go on undisturbed. Some people like to do it in their minds, and others prefer to write it down. Again, there's no fixed method for this; do what feels right for you, as that has the most effect. Start by asking yourself internally, "What am I grateful for?" By asking the question internally multiple times, you trigger your awareness, and things will come to mind naturally. Don't be afraid to give in to it; mention everything that comes to mind, because there's no right or wrong. Set aside the necessary time for this, whatever feels right for you, whether it's 5, 10, or 15 minutes. After the time has elapsed, step out of it again, even if you don't come up with anything. If you practice this regularly, you'll notice that you can think of more and more, because you become aware of it throughout the day. You'll eventually feel more joy in things you do and be grateful throughout the day; it will happen naturally. It will also affect how things affect you, your reactions, and emotions. You'll notice that you have a milder view on situations, but also of how others behave. I'm not saying you'll never get angry again or never have arguments, but maybe they won't escalate as often. The question you'll ask yourself every time is: how important is it to me at that moment? This is how I experienced it; again, there's no standard for this, and everyone experiences it in their own way. The result is often joy, experiencing more love, and realizing what's present around you. Do you want to experience gratitude? We're here to support you: The Effortless Movement.

"Why do you believe you're not good enough?" she asked. "My initial reaction was: really? Are you getting that from my story? I was completely unaware of that." Often, this feeling arises without knowing its origin, without understanding what triggered the creation of this self-image. The realization of "not being good enough" truly hit me when I experienced a burn-out and my body was forced to rest. It didn't feel good, but deep down, I knew it was necessary to go deeper within. The source of this feeling varies from person to person. It often arises from moments in life where you have felt very small and vulnerable. The belief that others are better makes you think you're not good enough. From that moment on the "journey" of not feeling good enough begins, where you constantly strive to match others to create a positive self-image. What does it feel like to feel "not good enough"? You feel unworthy, always less than others, which can lead you to feel rejected and excluded. In your eyes, someone else always does better, and no matter how hard you try, a compliment seems far away. You have already decided for yourself that you are "not good enough". Therefore, it doesn’t matter where these situations occur, both professionally and personally, the feeling continues to haunt you. I frequently experienced situations where I was confronted with low self-esteem and perfectionistic behavior, without knowing the underlying cause. I tried talking about it and decided to approach it differently next time. But with each repetition of the situation, the same feeling insinuated itself once more. What can the consequences be of feeling "not good enough"? People who feel not good enough often push themselves to the limit, but there is no stop button. They constantly try to escape that feeling. At the same time, they often strive to show others how good they are, while constantly seeking validation from others, hoping to feel better about themselves. This can have a major impact on their relationships and work. It can also lead to negative thoughts and feelings, making it difficult to be satisfied with oneself. In my case, the feeling of "not good enough" manifested itself in a need for validation, aiming for others to notice me and express appreciation towards me. The validation I had longed for. In this way, your self-worth becomes dependent on the approval of others. You seek external validation to feel good about yourself. However, true self-worth begins from within. How can you deal with this feeling? Often people think they are the only ones who feel not good enough, I used to think that too. The most important thing is to realize that the feeling of "not good enough" does not define you. This feeling often arises from low self-confidence and is a shared experience; you are not unique in this. You can try to discover where this feeling comes from and what its cause is. Sometimes it lies deep in the subconscious and requires patience and effort to access it. Nonetheless, it is valuable to understand how this feeling came about. Unfortunately, insight into the cause is not a miracle cure. It will be a challenge that requires patience, attention, and awareness to eventually heal and let go whenever you are ready for it. Recently, I learned what caused the feeling in me. This allows me to give it a place and understand myself better when the feeling arises again. By looking at myself lovingly, I feel more compassion for myself and for the situations I find myself in. This insight didn't come by itself. Last year, during my period of rest, I reconnected with my friend Astrid. She advised me to start meditating because of my situation. She talked about different meditation techniques, but I preferred Primordial Sound Meditation (PSM). Luckily, she is a PSM teacher and guided me through the whole process. When I started meditating, I gained deeper insights. By being aware of this limiting belief, with her help and support, I was able to feel, heal, and let go of the events in a healthy way. "In the end people will judge you anyway. So don’t live your life impressing others – live your life impressing yourself." - Eunice Camacho Infante - Let's effortlessly follow the path to self-esteem, independent of external validation, but driven by love and compassion: The Effortless Movement.

When we are born, we are pure, fully ourselves. We don't have much trouble with memories or unpleasant experiences stored in our minds. How does that exactly work? Our mind roughly consists of: explicit memory (conscious memories), emotional memory (emotions and feelings), implicit memory (unconscious memories), and the residue of memory (habits and skills). Building the mind already starts in the womb. You receive various stimuli here, such as sounds, smells, tastes, and even intergenerational transmission. All these memories are stored in the implicit memory (unconscious memories) also known as the subconscious. As we grow up, more and more memories are added to the mind, in all shapes and forms. In order to survive when you were young, you sometimes perhaps thought you can determine whether to keep an unpleasant memory or not. Sometimes, we bury the negative memory and emotions so deeply because we simply cannot process them at that moment. After many years, we have already filled our mind quite a bit with all sorts of memories. And a substantial part of it is in our subconscious mind. As we age, we all have a moment of reflection. Is this life? What do I want to take from life? What do I actually want to achieve in life? Why am I here? By reflecting, you see what challenges you face as a person. Your struggles may be related to unpleasant emotions from the past that you haven't yet let go of in a healthy way. If we don't properly feel and release certain negative emotions, they remain deeply stored in our subconscious. It then becomes difficult to access them later in life. You may assume that these memories and emotions have disappeared. In reality, however, that's not the case. Our memory is like a "black box" of an airplane, everything remains recorded, whether we want it to or not. All memories always remain part of our memory. What's important is that we take a look at what we're struggling with; what do we want to understand, and what message does the memory hold? With the aim of healing your negative emotions in a healthy way and thus returning to yourself. For this reason, we'll peel away the memories, or rather the mind, like an onion, layer by layer to get to the core. Because some memories and emotions are deeply buried in the subconscious mind, it may require more effort to access them. Meditation can help you gain access to the subconscious. "In is the only way out." - Sadhguru - Meditation has many benefits, where returning to your pure self is one of them. It helps you access your subconscious mind. This helps in peeling and understanding the memories in the subconscious where traumas are also stored. There are many meditation techniques, one of which is Primordial Sound Meditation brought from India to the West by Deepak Chopra. We teach people to meditate according to this meditation technique. With Primordial Sound Meditation, you gain access to your subconscious mind at a deeper level and you can work on feeling those buried emotions from the past to ultimately let them go in a healthy way. You don't have to do this alone, by engaging with a Life Coach, you learn how to break through these layers, how to peel the onion to get to the core, and gradually return to your pure self. Do you want to work on this? Are you willing to peel the onion? We are here to support you on this journey. Plan your 30-minute free intake to get more information. This way, you become part of a movement on Earth that embraces the effortless flow of life: The Effortless Movement.